The roles of men and women
What do you like most about being a woman or man?
Please share from your experience on the best ways to integrate the male and female energies in couple relationships and in life in general.
How do you see the roles of men and women evolving in today’s world?
DR VIJI BALASUBRAMANIAN
Leadership and Wellness Coach
I like to think of myself as a progressive woman, while at the same time I like many traditional aspects of being a woman. Nurturing and nourishing are the two female energies that are very strong in me, and I love being able to express them very easily.
My daughter recently asked me if love or respect was the most necessary between husband and wife. I did not have to think much: love to start with, but definitely respect as the relationship matures. A respect for each other that is earned organically with time. A respect that comes because each one understands the strength, the energy, that the other person brings into the relationship. I have always felt that this understanding is fundamental, as it allows a higher intelligence to bloom and in turn allows the energies to integrate and create a garden of sweet fragrance. It is also important not to stereotype gender energies, because this allows for each one of us to be who we are at any given moment, in synchronization with our mind-heart body. It makes the relationship authentic and lively. In our home, my husband is spontaneous, energetic and fun, whereas I am slower, more careful, and like to invest in the future. Not holding on to what our energies must be and respecting them in each other has helped us integrate and create a sacred and harmonious energy balance in our home. It is something that keeps our life moving, purposeful and fun, and I feel this holds true for any relationship in life, not just a couple.
I can increasingly observe the presence of both the male and female energies in me. My practice of observing myself in a detached way has helped me in using these energies in a meaningful and efficient way. I have learnt to balance being friendly with being firm, being focused yet forgiving, being sharp but sweet tempered. Gender roles and boundaries are dissolving at a rapid rate in today’s world, giving both men and women a myriad of opportunities to create the world they want – their own world and the world they live in. It’s up to each one of us to flow with this shifting paradigm and see ourselves for the energies we carry, refine them through deep and reflective practices, and create our roles, be it man or woman.
DR MICHAEL KARASSOWITSCH
Professor of Architecture
In most cultural traditions, one assumes it is genes that define the expression of gender, but these days gender can express ever more freely. For me gender is not a choice I question; I treat it as natural. With male DNA I feel I am relatively less constrained – both from practical and socially induced limitations – than it appears women generally are. I feel very narrowly tied to the world in a way that seems very intense but brittle like iron. The tether is thinner than women’s wide earthly foundation. I like feeling it is a brittle tie that will be snapped by other forces.
A good way to integrate male and female energies is to feel how they are versions of one energy. One would not say that the two poles of a battery are two energies. As Carl Jung noted that all of us are both genders, it is logically only one energy and that one energy is ‘my life’. The integration of genders is a function of karma and attachments we have in the form of male and female differences. Generating love in myself, along with faith and confidence, will eventually relieve all differences. Practicing as a seeker is a way to enhance and accelerate that.
The change in the roles of men and women today is tectonic. In the Earth’s tectonics, if one plate moves the others do too. In male and female relations there is nowhere to go. Great zones of Being are passing by each other causing a lot of turbulence and shaking. It’s all within the one sphere. Male and female roles are constructs that represent attachments and the karma through which humanity lives its responsibility in this epoch.
Gender is sahaj, like any Being. I feel that male and female roles are to realize the harmony that is necessarily always already there. To ‘realize’ means in this case to live the harmony rather than maleness or femaleness.
Social and Emotional Learning Educator
I like the creative energy that seems innate in women. I also appreciate when women come together in community. I appreciate the nurturing environment we create together and how we communicate, collaborate and share with one another.
In my experience, there is a single-minded focus and intensity to male energy while female energy tends to be broader and multi-directional. In relationships, and in life in general, both of these qualities have their place and both have value. We can learn from each other and recognize how and when to utilize each one.
In many parts of the world, the traditional roles of men as breadwinners and women as carers and home managers have largely been redefined. Women are in the working world, and men are expected to help raise children and take care of the home. Professionally women have much to offer – in general their style of management and communication differs from men and can positively affect the culture of a workplace to one of more cooperation and collaboration. Families and children can benefit from having both parents model broader roles that include working, raising children and managing a home.
The best thing about being a man is the characteristic of ego. Although ego can cause more harm than good, if directed properly it gives a sense of purpose and onepointed approach. It gives objectivity in the depths and vastness of the human mind. It serves as a course-correction tool, in keeping us on track in the journey of evolution.
Human life is the culmination of various actions and reactions. In my opinion, the definition of a near perfect action is that which has minimal reaction to it. Just as an action cannot exist without purpose or objective, a reaction cannot exist if there is pure empathy. A man is objective by nature, which is a characteristic of the ego. A woman is empathetic by nature, which is a characteristic of love. So in any given situation or point in time, if the male objectivity is integrated with the female empathy, we might end up with the perfect godlike action! I think this is the higher purpose of couple relationships, where this complement happens in the most natural way.
Evolution is synonymous with ascension. To ascend on the vertical plane, there is a need to experience the horizontal spectrum. In the beginning, the role of man was to hunt and protect and the role of woman was to create and nurture. In today’s modern world, we have the luxury and the opportunity to go beyond these basic roles. Today a woman can go out into the world and be objective, and a man has the opportunity to be at home and learn to love. We are in an era which is suitable to explore these energies and experience the complete spectrum. The moment we have experienced the complete spectrum, there is no other way than the way upward!
August 31, 2018
August 31, 2018
July 30, 2018